Twists and Turns
by Azette
Summary: Lying, is not a thing he hated, oh on the contrary, he invented the lies, but when Aziraphale came in the scenery, it was a whole new story. He had to dig his way out, and at a cost. Following Adam's childhood and Crow and Zira's relationship. WIP
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimers: The characters don't belong to me (of course since it's **fanfiction**), they belong to Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett.

**Twists and turns**

He knew that the baby would bring trouble; he **was** the Antichrist after all. He should have been destroyed the minute Crowley got his polished hands on him. But he followed orders, he was a 'good' demon, sort of say. Now the feeling of guilt was tormenting him. He told Aziraphale that the kid was dead, six feet under, suffocated by the solid ground...not playing happily in front of him while he was acting the nanny role. "_Damn you angel...damn you and your nature_" he scolded, knowing that he, himself was the only one to blame for this...and Hell too, it always, ALWAYS ruined his plans, like some hundred of years ago. Drumming his fingers on his crossed legs, Crowley remembered how the demons called him back for an urgent meeting. How he missed his body from back then, he couldn't find it after he came back either. Not that his actual body was of lower standards, oh not at all. He even began liking the pitch black hair and the expressive eyes. He looked like a human demon, being quite proud of himself for coming up with that definition. The kid waved to him, and good manners demanded that he return the gesture, with a rigid steer of the hand. After all this was finished, he'll make that angel pay for every diaper he had to change, for every time the brat pucked on him, AND for every time the mother tried to seduce him. Humans were vile, even demons stood and wondered at the atrocity brought by human hands. And in modern times, it was worse, worse than worse (he had to remember to invent a new word for human mischief) than anything he ever experienced...and he lived for a, let's just say, pretty long while.

"Cowley" the kid started whining again, great.

"Yes dear" the human demon (he should start addressing to himself like that he wasn't quite ready to go back to Hell and give up the miracles of human kind, such as from now on) forced a smile that would scare off legions of horse ridding Atillas. "And it's C**r**owley, not Cowley, you damn brat" he added in a growl. Of course, what could he expect form an involved two years and a half human offspring, that will probably grow up and destroy the world, but that was later on, and it will surely not happen on his round...to be added that fast-food, cars, speed limits to be broken, television...and most of all mobile phones. Oh and he should add blackmail on that list too. Humans really DO think of everything on their way up to success don't they? The annoying pulling at his sleeve made him pay attention to the person (half-person actually) at his feet.

"I need to wee-wee".

Crowley's eyes widened beyond belief as soon as the kid opened his mouth. He just changed his suit (he did that every time he had to bathe the child or take him to the toilet) and he was getting annoyed at doing it so often. "Now?! Can't you wait?" he hoped but the boy shook his head. With a look of total disgust while cursing God, Satan and ESPECIALLY Aziraphale in his mind (he actually began pondering if he should just tell his winged friend and get it over with, couldn't be worse than this anyway) he got up from the bench placed in the far end of the park and walked Adam between the trees. His hand opened the boy's fly (while Crowley was thinking of every torture method he knew for the angel). Then his hands, perfectly manicured, held him up while he was doing his thing. A ring in his ear announced him that someone was looking for him. "Oh for all the fires in Hell" Crowley cursed. "Adam stand"

"But I'm not done..."

"Stand fiend!" and when the boy finally did what he was told, the demon snapped his fingers and answered his phone (while Adam was amazingly floating in mid air). "Yes?" he tried to be polite. You may never know when someone wants to make a deal with you over the phone, or sell you something new that will probably break in some hours, while the company evaporates as soon as it took your money.

"Hello there" a calm voice made him erase all his thoughts. It was suddenly hard to breathe out there, (between the trees, there was no pollution…he needed to have a talk with him and solve that matter) **if** he actually breathed.

"H-hello" he suddenly realized that he was sounding odd, immediately correcting that. "What? I'm busy angel"

"You've been busy for almost three years, aren't you about done?"

Crowley sighed, he had to lie, it was his job. He was good at doing it (not to mention that he was born with this ability, he actually had millennia to improve it too), almost too good, but this wasn't the same. "It's not the fourteen century anymore you know, us demons have a hard time trying to think of something despicable, that humans haven't thought of yet. Best thing I came up with is cutting off the phone lines during rush hours...can you imagine the chaos?" he added with a giggle. He could actually hear Aziraphale's stern look through the phone, if he tried a bit more, he could see it too.

"And I'm sure that the other demons appreciated your acts of evilness" the angel's voice was dripping with sarcasm. "However, even demons need some time off"

"Evil doesn't sleep" Crowley quoted an old saying (he actually heard it in a movie and thought he should assume credit for it).

"Oh then it clearly isn't referring to you, you slept through almost the whole seventeen century." Aziraphale said matter-of-factly.

"Yet you can't affirm that the evil-doers were any less" the human demon protected his pride.

"That's not my point. Listen I don't have all eternity, tonight, dinner at the Ritz?"

"Of course, I'm paying" Crowley detected the subtle message

"If you insist, make it at eight, I have something I need to take care of at the shop." Aziraphale quickly said and hung up, leaving Crowley to take care of the reservations.

"Snake!" the human demon hissed in the receiver and shoved the phone back in his Armani pants (worth more than Satan could ever pay out of his salary). With a snap of his long fingers, Adam landed on the ground with a small thump. "We're going home" Crowley said with a tone that refused any comments (of course, not if you're a two and a half year old Antichrist).

"I wanna pway Cowley!"

"You're the spawn of Satan you don't play you **destroy**" Crowley mumbled and then added in a normal tone "C**r**owley you brat, and no you can't play anymore, nanny...I mean **I **have some business to attend to" he needed to get away, fast! Opening the back door to his Bentley he shoved Adam inside, fastening the seat-belt on the way (with another snap of his fingers of course, he was in a hurry). The sooner he let the brat home, the sooner he could meet with that dammed angel. He wasn't about to admit or even accept it, but he missed the winged creature, and it wasn't anything like the fourteen century. Back in those days, Aziraphale merely met with him to scold him for his recent deeds (he never got the real point of the increasing evil around) and now, well with Crowley's miraculous invention called the restaurant, they could meet more often (when Crowley asked him out to lunch or dinner, always on his treat). A police car singled for him to pull over, and the demon let out a frustrated sigh. Making a complicated wave of his hand, the police car suddenly stopped dead in the middle of the road, smoke coming out of the front part. Feeling more relieved now (and causing two or three car crashes and a street fight added to that) Crowley reached for his phone and dialled the restaurant's number.

"Ritz restaurant, how may I help you?" the same girl answered, same voice, same tone, same line.

"Table for two please, at eight, Anthony J. Crowley" he said with a sigh, clenching a bit at his phone as the other hand rested on the leather wheel of the car. "Smokers" he added and then closed the phone, throwing it on the seat next to him. The hand that was holding it raised to his temples and started massaging the area slowly. Demons don't get headaches, but they do get tired from time to time. For Crowley, it was only the beginning. A pair of eyes gazed at the mirror, looking for Adam. The boy didn't move from his spot (not that he could anyway, with Crowley's seat-belts), he was looking out the window, probably thinking of how to torture his 'nanny' more. The radio turned on, playing his usual Queen tape, for a while, and then it started making weird noises.

"_Crowley?_" Hastur's voice could be heard instead of the lyrics.

"Honestly, can't you demons learn how to use a mobile phone? I'm sure I can set up a line straight to Hell, so you won't bother me nor my songs!" Crowley hissed annoyed.

"_How's the child demon? Is everything going according to plan?_" The Duke of Hell ignored Crowley's complains.

"Yes you over-grown-worm-infested-creature! Do you think I'm taking care of him just because I like to clean his shit?" his fingers started drumming on the wheel as his eyes drifted up again. They weren't black anymore. "Fuck!" it came out louder than he expected. Adam was giggling. "Shut up fiend!"

"_What?!_"

"Not you! The other fiend that's pestering me with its mere existence"

"_Never talk like that about Satan's son_" the voice filled the car as Hastur got mad.

"You try changing his diapers and then we'll see…" Crowley mumbled under his breath.

"_Listen here you low life demon…_"

"Awww Hastur you really don't have to praise me so much" Crowley said matter-of-factly.

"_Hell will freeze over by the time I praise you for something, you low pathetic excuse for a demon_" Hastur raised his tone.

"Ok ok ok enough with the sweet talk, the kid's fine, he's shitting normally, he's doing a **great** job annoying me and he's alive. Now can you please allow me to enjoy my music?"

"_You have been tempted by the mortal world Crowley_" Hastur managed to say before Crowley turned off the radio.

"Piss off…" he said under his breath. "As a demon I feel proud to learn from humans…Hell is a small kid compared to them" he directed his eyes at the mirror again. "**Shit**!" again, it came out a bit louder than he wanted to, and Adam started giggling. A single look from his 'nanny' made the laugh turn into a cough and then into silence.

"Where are you going Cowley?" Adam asked, figuring that the demon had too much relaxation, more than he needed anyway.

"C**r**owley!! And it's none of your business, like a kid could understand…" he was about to go on when the kid interrupted.

"I wanna go too!"

"You need some manners, the Hell am I taking you to meet Aziraphale!" the human demon put on his glasses to cover his now yellow, cat-like eyes. He blamed it on the Stress, of course making a mental note to have a face to horn talk with him back in Hell. "Besides….you were supposed to be dead" he added in a whisper more to himself. The car made a sudden turn (and two other crashed) as Crowley pulled on the wheel. He parked in front of the house, neglecting the "No parking" sign, like the good demon he was, and unfastened Adam's seatbelt. The boy followed him to the front door, and destroyed the demon's chances of escape by yelling for his mother.

"**Shit** kid! Don't scream…hello there miss" the door opened and a rather young woman appeared in front of him with a radiant smile on her face (of course, it **was** Crowley).

"My dear, back so soon?" a wave of the hand invited him in the house.

"I'm afraid I have some business to attend to, a rather important meeting that I cannot delay, so I brought young Adam home" Crowley faked his British accent. Seems that English 'nannies' were at far grater search than American ones, so Crowley adapted (he also cut the power that day so that the old ladies couldn't come to the interview so he was the only one there, of course…he got the job, the mother liked him…and his looks).

"Oh, that's sad…I was about to drink a coffee and I didn't want to do it alone" she said in a more than subtle voice.

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry m'am but I really have to go…important meeting, can't be late" a real-fake smile appeared on his face. He could fake it very, very well.

"I guess it can't be helped then" a sigh, "…you **are** a very busy man, you must be…" eyelashes being flickered.

"That I am" a bow, "Now I must take my leave, I shall see you tomorrow, and your lovely son" a forced smile. He turned and opened the car door.

"Take care then, try not to be bored" the woman said cheerily.

"Miss you Cowley"

"C**r**owley" the door was slammed and the car took speed. He managed to escape, finally he was free, till tomorrow but he preferred not to think about it right now. Turning on the radio and pray…**hoping** that Hastur or any other Hell creature will interrupt his songs now, he leaned back on the chair and carelessly drove to Aziraphale's small shop (normally all this had to take a couple of hours, but it was Crowley at the wheel so it all happened in half an hour, or even less if he didn't took so much joy in watching the mischief he provoked on the way). Parking his Bentley in front of the shop he slowly knocked at the door. For some reason it seemed odd, he never knocked but an absence of three years made him think about manners. A tall person, wearing the same jacket as always (no matter how many times Crowley complained, the angel never changed his Tweed jacket), and with a rather annoyed look on his face.

"Lemme guess, you were reading." Crowley said sarcastic as soon as his friend opened the door.

"You're early" Aziraphale stepped aside and made the demon room to enter.

"Never heard you complaining about that" a raised eyebrow followed by a shake of hands (ok so maybe it was half a hug from Crowley's part). He took a seat on the uncomfortable chair as the angel went to bring something to drink. "You should really let me buy you at least and armchair, if you don't want to buy it yourself" the demon said looking around. Packed with books as always, what could he expect from an angel that does good all day?

"I'm perfectly satisfied with my shop the way it is thank you" he entered the room with two glasses and a bottle of whisky, "I don't want you messing around with it" the last words were emphasized.

"I got your point, jeez" Crowley rolled his eyes, though the action was hidden by the dark sun-glasses.

"You can take them off you know, you're with me now" as soon as Aziraphale spoke the glasses lost their royal place and ended up on the table.

"Must be The Stress" Crowley said and looked away. Not that he minded, but every time he looked at the angel's eyes he remembered about his cat-like ones, and needless to say, it wasn't much of a joy.

"It's something from your part, you should do something about it" the angel gave a small laugh. It couldn't be helped, Aziraphale may be an angel at origin, but he lived among humans for so long, even he started laughing and the demon's uneasiness. "Been so busy?"

"Hell's working me overtime, and I don't even have a salary to complain about"

"How did they react at the news you gave them? That the Antichrist is dead?" the inevitable question. If there was ever a time for Crowley to start breathing, **this** was it. Inhale and exhale, he should learn how to do this stuff.

"Of course they got mad, Satan went on a rampage that had nothing to do with grief of losing the child, more like, the fact that he had to create a new kid and even Satan gets lazy…and well…I'm set with the mission of finding out what happened." Crowley said, with an overdramatical sigh. Aziraphale looked at him and smiled (Crowley had to look twice to be convince it was really a smile and not a pout).

"You did the right…"

"Ok, I **know!** Just don't say it! I'm a demon do try and remember that angel!" Crowley thanked whoever was out there that Aziraphale didn't want to know about **how** he killed him, of course all kinds of methods ran through his head but they all involved diapers or toys, added the kid's mother on the killing list too.

"I always knew you had a good side" Aziraphale pushed on with the idea. Crowley took a sip out of the glass and gave his friend a mean look.

"Would you just zip it? Ok so I **did** something good for this world and I'll never hear the end of it from you, also I won't have to if Hastur hears about this, so let's keep it low." He wasn't upset, not at all, but the situation was strange to say the least. Shifting in his chair he finally found a rather comfortable position. It didn't help his situation though.

"Ok, just because you're taking me out at the Ritz, after **I** insisted on it. Come to think of it, **what** in Heaven's name did you do for so long my boy?"

"Stop sounding like a gay man if you're not planning on becoming one" Crowley hissed, "…and I was busy, creating havoc and stuff like that" the hiss became a murmur.

"You can create havoc here too, don't tell me you're suddenly ashamed of being your demoly self around me, now are you?" the angel crocked an eyebrow at him. Curious, he didn't breathe, but he found himself chocking over the whisky.

"Wha…what in the name of your tweed jacket are you talking about angel? I'm not ashamed, it's not mentioned in the demon's way to be." Crowley shifted again in his chair.

"Then why go so far for your demonly deeds?" oh that damned angel wouldn't give up now would he.

"Oh for Go…Sa…Manchester's sake angel! I was tired of hearing your complains. There…now what do you have to say about this?" Crowley folded his arms and tried to look upset. "_Ha! Let's see what you have to say about that one_" his mind already registered the victory over the discussion. The human demon always wins (if there's not an Aziraphale involved that is, he still needed to learn that).

"Oh…my G..dear!" Aziraphale changed mid-word as soon as he saw Crowley's face. "Well then, you could have just told me…and I would have stopped, it was quite dull without you…and I couldn't get my job done either." The angel looked at his almost empty glass, and refilled it with a blink.

"W….**excuse me?! **Ask **you?** And you would have stopped…just like that? Somehow, I highly doubt it, you know….it's in your eyes, you're lying…."

"I do feel offended. Angels do not lie, as you reckon, but why did you have to leave just like that?" Aziraphale glared a bit, but his angelic nature didn't allow him to hold that look for more than a couple of seconds.

"Why are you so interested in my departure, you….didn't miss me now did you?" the slight snake grin appeared on the demon's face, showing his white teeth. "And what's that about 'not doing your job because of my absence' thing? You know I don't feel guilty about you not being able to spread 'love and peace' all around"

"I…I most certainly did not miss you, not…not that much anyway. And without you creating disasters what's an angel to do the whole day?" Aziraphale suddenly stood up and walked over to the bookshelves. "I honesty read them almost twice…every copy" he emphasised the last two words.

"Go back on that matter will you?" the grin was still there, nothing good was about to come.

"What matter?"

"The 'I didn't miss you **that** much' part…you did didn't you?" if it was possible, the grin spread across his face even more.

"Oh…aren't we late for the restaurant?" Aziraphale started walking towards the door. He was caught though by two arms and turned around, coming face to teeth with Crowley.

"No no Zira my dear, we have **all the time in the world**" he pushed the angel back in his chair and looked him in the eyes. "Now…angels do not lie, you said it yourself and as much as I love going back home early and Google myself up, probably writing a page on wikipedia, I want to get this straight." He almost sissed out of satisfaction.

"My dear…didn't you make a list with some things you won't do anymore? What was it…no more sticking coins to the ground, or…no more smoking outside Hell's gates?" Aziraphale shifted a bit, trying to get away from his friend…no use.

"Not my fault Satan put the "No smoking" signs everywhere, said that there's too much smoke already." Crowley said with a note of annoyance.

"Vanity is a sin you know…"

"Please….feeding ducks causes their death, you get them so fat they can't fly anymore." Crowley said, his grin returning, "Besides, Sin is my cousin, I can talk it out with him…now answer my question"

"I…" Aziraphale turned his head, probably found something interesting on the floor.

"This is getting cliché, just answer" Crowley started drumming his fingers.

"If you really must know…I did, there was no one to create havoc around, and I had nothing to do."

"Sure sure, and Heaven is a residence in Hell…confess angel" that grin was getting strangely close.

"Playing stupid won't help now will it?" a shake of the head answered his question. He gave a loud sigh and looked at the cat-like eyes. "Skip dinner tonight?"

Crowley's eyes started sparkling. "If you wish, I doubt the restaurant will catch fire if we're not there…"

"It had better not" Aziraphale gave him a suggestive look.

"Not planning on doing anything with one of my favourite places, you think so little of me" the human demon said with a sigh. "Ok, we'll skip it, but you'd better tell me everything, or else I'll make you commit a sin"

"I would never ever do that, you know…well" his words came to a halt as Crowley leaned forward.

"I wouldn't be that sure" a snake-like tongue appeared between his lips. "You know, I've been told I do a lot of good things with this tongue" it was a hiss, so the angel thought (wished) he heard him wrong.

"My dear, do step aside this distance is rather…uncomfortable, your back must hurt" the angel tried to save himself from the current situation.

"I'm quite fine, don't try to wiggle your way out of this one, now stay still" two hands pressed him on the back of the chair, "…and tell me what made you refuse my chocolate desert at the Ritz."

"Oh my…we had chocolate? Can I change my mind now?" Aziraphale said with a smile (maybe….just maybe).

"Not a chance in Hell, Heaven or Earth" the grin returned (good-bye delicious desert) and the face closed in a few more inches.

"Yes…I supposed it isn't moral to change my mind so soon, could you wait a couple of minutes?"

"Angel…"

"Yes?" would he actually wait? Aziraphale was reluctant but he still hoped.

"Shut the fuck up" and then a pair of lips descended on the already parted ones.

"Oh my…" it was more of a guess from the human demon since Aziraphale couldn't speak, more like…whine (he **did** do good stuff with his tongue). A hand was placed on the angel's shoulder and made an attempt of removing the clothing that covered the skin there.

"I don't think that…" his attempts of resisting were cut off by the tongue that re-entered his mouth, thus making them transform in a moan, or something close to it.

"Shut up, you've been talking for the last six millennia, time to zip it, and let the others use their mouths the way **they** know best" Crowley hissed with pleasure and leaned to lick the angel's neck. "Now, isn't this better than chocolate dessert?" of course he didn't expect any answer, but a **moan**, that was something he never even dreamed of (in the few times he actually slept, he was too busy imagining ways to seduce this angel –looks like dreams can come true-).

"Dear…I…" he tried and he tried, but with no success, and what was the (**poor**) angel to do? Subdue to the ministrations (if he were to say that he didn't like it he would be lying, and angels do not lie). A cold hand entered beneath his shirt and he shivered a bit, though he knew that he shouldn't be able to feel cold. "I…presume…no escape?"

"None" Crowley stopped just to answer and then he returned to his previous act of licking and sucking at the exposed skin, gradually letting even more show off as his head dropped lower, probably lower than Aziraphale would have imagined, if he only looked (his eyes were firmly shut, probably thinking that this was, after all, a dream). The hand dripped lower, close to the zipper of the pants, and then it climbed up again, reaching the left nipple. He pinched and then brought his mouth to it, sucking almost greedily at the flesh, extracting all sorts of sounds for the angel. "Now that's something you don't hear everyday…moans of an angel, I can get used to them." A short pause in the act of torture. Just as he was about to answer, the demon (human demon) returned to the process he interrupted. The hand bluntly slipped lower and lower until it reached the zipper. He knew, of course he knew that angels were sexless, but in this moment, even Aziraphale couldn't restrain himself, and Crowley was counting on that. He could, with less effort, do this with just the blink of an eye, undressing Aziraphale that is, but living among people, taught him a thing or two (this was one of them, the second was that inactive phones were a real annoyance for everyone).

"Boxers? Zira, and I thought you would wear old type of underwear, something like…they wore in the middle ages, you surprise me." Crowley hissed, and carefully slid down his pants (they weren't Armani like his so he didn't have to worry about them so much). And there is was, in all it's splendour and hardness. He **knew**, he just knew that Zira would make an effort, now at least. As the air hit his skin, the angel let out a small sound, that couldn't actually be classified as a moan, but something close to it nonetheless.

"Damn you…" was that all he wanted to say, or better yet, al that he **could** say, given the circumstances? Of course, Aziraphale was a per…hum…**creature** of few words, so hearing so much from him in one night, was something worth remembering.

"I told you I'd make you sin" oh that grin again, and this time, he was actually looking, at his usual flat (now high and hard) space between his legs. The angel closed his eyes, fearing (embarrassed, actually) what came next. It seemed that the demon's head was getting closer and closer to his intimate space. And then suddenly he felt it, and he was about to faint. The lips placed upon his own hardness took his breath away (he didn't have one to begin with), and the bobbing motion added to the sensation.

"Oh G…" he stopped as Crowley's fingers entered his mouth. 'No mentioning of any saints thank you' Aziraphale got the message and slid his tongue across the fingers. That made the demon gave a low humm, which, the whole thing being a vicious circle, made Aziraphale grab the dark hair with one hand and push Crowley down. It was new, but as sure as Hell, the angel was good at it (have to trust the instincts). He let his tongue work on the upper half, while his hand started rubbing and applying pressure on the lower one. He felt something in his mouth, when he let his tongue wonder off the tip of Zira's length, and he knew that the angel wasn't far from climaxing. The fingers left their usual place, meaning Aziraphale's mouth, and started placing wet patterns on his nipples, and then on his abdomen.

"Ngh…" that was the most coherent sound he could make, given the situation. Suddenly the lips left his length and were place upon his own. The eyes flew open and they met the yellow cat-like ones that were almost grinning. He demanded entrance, or rather, his tongue did, and Aziraphale was more than happy to oblige. The kiss deepened as he found himself pushing the demon closer and closer. He could feel the grin across his lips, a second later, the warmth covered his length as he gave a high-pitch moan. Something was building up in the pit of his stomach, and when Crowley let his tongue slide across the top, he felt like he exploded in his mouth.

"Sin is served" Crowley said while getting up and licking his lips, as if he quite enjoyed this.

"I hope…this…won't come as a record on your wikipedia page…now won't it?"

"Only on LiveJournal, don't worry." He pulled the angel up and stole another kiss. "You have to admit, chocolate was nothing compared to this."

"You really are a good fellow"

"Where did that come from?? I just made you have intimate relations with a demon, what's good in that?"

"You told the truth" Aziraphale said with a wide grin.

"Oh…." That was all that eh could mutter. Aziraphale had a radiant smile on his face (that probably had nothing to do with the after glory of the orgasm he just had) and Crowley couldn't help but snicker a bit himself. "You'll Fall for this you know"

"Dear, I was forced on doing this, it's your fault"

"Forced my horns" the human demon raised an inquiring eyebrow and Aziraphale looked away, "I didn't sense you pushing me away."

"You reckon we have time to get to the restaurant?" the angel asked, eyes filled with hope.

"Not a chance, you asked to stay home, and home we'll stay" Crowley said with a gleam in his own yellow eyes. "You can't wiggle your way out if this one, brought it upon yourself, you know…" the grin, the eternal grin was added at the end of that sentence.

"Oh my dear…" his voice dropped suddenly.


	2. Chapter 2

A grin…ok…make that a big grin was on Crowley's face as he left the shop the next day

A grin…ok…make that a **big** grin was on Crowley's face as he left the shop the next day. Of course, the angel would complain a millennia for this, but he couldn't help himself. He **was** a demon after all. His precious Bentley was waiting for him outside, opening its door at the simple snap of the demon's (human demon) fingers. Freddy's voice filled his ears again as he turned on the radio, but it was soon replaced by Hastur's growl.

"_Where the Hell were you?!_" ok…he was mad.

"Out doing my job" he was in a way too good of a mood to let it be ruined.

"_Your job is to protect Satan's child!_" Hastur roared.

"My job is to create mischief and try to overpass the humans in doing it too…" Crowley said calmly, as the images from last night zoomed through his head. "The kid's ok…prolly shitting in his crib or…something close to it"

"_You shall be punished demon_" the voice wanted to be threatening, but it didn't manage to discourage the human demon.

"Hey I can't Fall any lower now can I? Now Hastur, if you please, I have a job to do" with that said he turned off the radio, regretting the loss of the songs and passed the limit speed with 40 miles per hour. It was a freeway, so by the definition, it had to be as he pleased, especially since he could never take 'no' for an answer. Though…come to think about it, he wasn't actually so keen on arriving at his destination **that** fast. His car automatically slowed down, at the mere thought and Crowley let out yet another frustrated sigh. But no, he wasn't about to give in to Temptation (really needed to have a talk with him), he wanted to keep his cheery mood for a while longer. Two hours and 14 minutes, he counted; it was the exact time his trip on the freeway lasted, the exact time when his car pulled in front of the damn house. The door opened and a bundle of joy (annoyance) ran towards him.

"Don't touch the car!" Crowley got out fast and spread his arms in a threatening way. "It's clean"

"Cowley!" the brat clung to his leg like a leech and he had to drag him into the house, like a dog that refused to let go of his precious bone (in this case, it wasn't far form the truth).

"Would you mind?!" he tried to keep his tone calm, to mimic a breath, an inhale and an exhale (of course he failed, learning how to breathe isn't an easy matter, only humans could do it properly).

"I missed you, what did you do so long?" he was still clinging when Crowley entered the kitchen.

"I had **work** to do" he emphasised on the word, added a grin, a **wide** grin. "People have to work you know".

"Oh my drear, I didn't hear you come in" Deirdre popped in front of our demon.

"I tried to be quiet not to disturb you m'am" Crowley took a step back and tried balancing himself on one leg (it was hard to walk with a clingy child on your leg, even if you're a demon) .

"Nonsense, dear" she stretched her arms so that the fabric of her shirt would rise and let loose the image of her abdomen (she gain some weight after giving birth), in a very (un)sexy view. "You're never disturbing, besides, my husband is out, so that makes it just **us** for a while" there was a wink, he was sure he saw it (of course he ignored it, no amount of sin should call for the view of a recently-pregnant-but-not-pregnant-anymore woman's flabby stomach skin and extra weight, he didn't deserve this).

"**And** Adam…yes" he nodded and tried to un-cling the leech that pestered him. "You seem tired, why don't you get some sleep?"

"Adam can go out an play, won't you dear?" she made that sweet motherly face that parents put on only when they want something from their kids, in this case Crowley pra…**hoped** it wasn't it.

"Naha!" the kid tightened his grip on the leg even more (if it was possible). "I missed him" at that remark Crowley started, his eyes almost popping through the glasses. He **loved** that brat, he really did, truly, in that moment he loved him.

"I think I need some time with Adam, if he missed me so" Crowley hid the relief smile that wanted to burst on his face. His reply was accompanied by the kid's nodding.

"Of course, how silly of me, you two are inseparable aren't you?" was there sarcasm? Actually the question was: did he really care? He got away, **RUN!** "Adam, if you want to go out with your **nanny** go and get dressed"

"_Oh shit, doomed_" the demon's mind sent out warnings. The kid let go of his leg and walked out of the kitchen humming something that was dangerously close to "Cowley's back, lalala" it was so sweet that his teeth started hurting.

"So…" footsteps echoed around him, "…busy last night?"

"Y-yes! I-I went to see my girlfriend!" that was it, the escape, oh Go…Sat…Manchester! He was free! (of course the image of Zira in a dress and high-heels didn't help his laugh, not one bit, he had, really positively had to see him dressed like that).

"Oh…" there was a pause, a longer pause actually, "…you…you have a girlfriend?!" shock? Curiosity? What the Hell was written all over her face?

"Yes…blonde, tall, blue eyes, a bit nerdy, spends all hi-her time reading books and doing good stuff…but you have to love her" Crowley began ranting around hoping that Adam would hurry up and get dressed.

"My dear…" she retreated, only a bit, her mouth still forming a wide "O" from the shock (?), "…then you should bring her here, we must have dinner"

It was Crowley's time to let his mouth fall wide open. "I'm afraid she is kid of…shy, I mean she's not the social type, I'm sorry" he had to wiggle his way out of this one, he just had to, or he'll never hear the end of it.

"Really, what are we going to do, eat her? I swear, just one dinner" she was insisting, what the Hell was he supposed to do? He couldn't risk his job as the so-called "nanny", Satan would castrate him.

"I don't really know….I have to ask her first" he started shifting from one leg to another. "I can't guarantee anything you know"

"Of course you can and I think that young Adam would be delighted to meet her, I'm sure of it" she added one of her I-really-am-up-to-something-smiles.

"I…I…" he swallowed hard, "I'll see what I can do" he was defeated, by a human even…no…he will never bow! He will succeed in this…in this hole he dug for himself.

"Good" the triumphal smile was there oh Go…Manchester, it was there. There was a small sound at the front door and then Adam could be heard.

"Cowley I'm ready, I wanna go pway" oh why did the voice sound so annoying?

"Yes…coming" he wanted to run…and run and run (maybe killing the kid wasn't a bad idea after all….he could blame it on an overdose of chocolate, the kid ate like a pig anyway). His feet dragged him out the door and into his precious car. He refused to turn on the radio, he simply refused to let his day get any worse than it already was.

"Whe'e did you go eh? Whe'e did you go?" the brat was persistent ( he seemed to have forgotten that because of him he wasn't in that kitchen anymore).

"Oh for fuck's sake kid, I scored with a friend happy now?" he was losing his tiny patience (microscopic actually).

"Like a football game?" oh the pure innocence, he had, he just had to taint it.

"Yes, like a football game, the ball goes straight in the goalposts, right on target." He couldn't suppress his grin this time, he didn't even try to.

"So you played football all night?" he was a kid, of course.

"Yes, all…night…long…" Crowley finally said with long pauses between the words. He fixed his glasses on his nose and descended from his leather seat (followed by a floating Adam). "Ok brat, you go kil…play, I have something to do." He settled himself on a bench and took out his cell phone. "_Ok so one dinner, what harm can it do? I'll ask madam Young to keep Adam away from us…prolly send him to his gramma or something….and I'll tell Zira that I had to do this or else I'd lose my…__**job as a nanny to the Anarchist! GREAT!**_". "Fuck" he cursed not caring about the children around. "Why the Hell is this happening to me? And why the hell am I caring so much about that damned angel's opinion?!" he was talking to the phone and he was aware of that. He didn't care.

"Trouble?" a hand was placed on his shoulder (and surprisingly, the air grew thick around him).

"You could say that…" of course, who else could come and tease you in the most horrible of moments except a good old friend? "Pestilence finally retired has he?"

"In 1936, and I can say that I'm glad I took over the job" the slick voice surrounded him. "That's the kid?"

"Yeah, he's Adam, the spawn of Satan; and so on…you get the idea." Crowley turned to see his friend and comrade. "So how do they call you now? Chalky? Mister White?"

"Both though I prefer simply Pollution, thank you." The man was a wonder. Of course his look had to deny everything he was (ironic, that's how it goes in Hell). He had white hair, his skin was almost white and his eyes were light grey…he was dressed in white too, and damn, he looked good for a pest.

"Figures, so what brought you to this nice village on this nice day?" he was sick, really, talking like that…

"The clean air, it demanded some adjustments. How's the surveillance going?"

"Couldn't get any worse" Crowley said with a grin…and then…"Hey…wait a minute…" the grin faded and it came back, worse than ever. "Chalky be my girlfriend!"

"E-excuse me? Did the Fall made you hit your head?! I just came to see how you're managing with the kid, probably have a laugh at your misery and…what the fuck?"

"I'm not asking you out on a date you blob! I'm telling you that I need you to be my girlfriend for a night, my job as a nanny to this kid depends on it" he hissed when he saw Pollution give him 'the look' of incertitude.

"What do I need to do?"

"Just…eat, don't say much and pretend you like me" Crowley almost jumped off the bench in joy. So he didn't have to tell the angel after all.

"That sounds like a hard job, who in Hell can like you?" Chalky said and laughed showing a perfect line of white teeth (no one never found out how he managed to keep them that clean). "Ok let's say I agree with your little charade…what's in it for me?"

"Snake!" Crowley hissed.

"Don't change the roles here, now tell me"

Crowley started drumming his fingers on the expensive fabric of his pants, a sign that he was getting annoyed. "The Hell, who have you been hanging with lately? Blackmail?"

"You've been gone a rather long time, I changed, things changed back in Hell."

"I can fairly see that…ok, since I have no way out of this, what do you want?"

He could see on his face that he was pondering on that question. "A body"

"Eh?! What's wrong with this one??" Crowley was expecting anything else, really he was.

"Got bored of it, besides, I'm tired of leaving oil stains behind me all the time"

"It's your job Je…Go…fuck!" he had to remind himself that he was in public. "Ok fair enough, nothing too complicated…yeah…so we have a deal?"

"Yeah, we do" he extended his hand and looked at Crowley with a wiped smile. Crowley did the same thing (while making a mental note to wash himself two times tonight). "So do I have to dress?"

"Yeah, you have to be a lady…with manners" he pointed out.

"I have manners, I'm graceful, I'm the perfect lady"

"And take a bath, you reek" Crowley waved his hand in front of his face.

"How can you tell?"

"The flowers around you died" he pointed to the withered grass and leaves that surrounded them.

"So blunt, I'm hurt" Pollution faked a mocking face, it didn't work, Crowley was better at faking.

"Actually it was a compliment for you"

"It was still blunt, even for a compliment" the subtle message was there, only Crowley could see it.

"Cowley, Cowley!!" Adam came rushing towards him. "I need to weewee again"

"Don't **dare** say a word about this or I'll make you eat soap and be clean on the inside too!!" Crowley hissed as he took Adam by the hand and pulled him between the trees. "Tomorrow night, be here round seven so that I can pick you up, try and look good!" he shouted as Adam was flowing around him.

"Will do" that was the only reply he got, when he looked again there was only a black stain in Chalky's place, and the air seemed a bit more colored than it should have.


	3. Chapter 3

He was nervous, he had to be, what if Pollution sucked at being a girl

He was nervous, he had to be, what if Pollution sucked at being a girl? It's not like he had practice (one may never know), so yes, he was rather not cool (which defied his definition) and he was pissed about it too. The Bentley stopped at the park entrance and his heart (imaginary) gave a loop. He's gonna blow it; he was sure, positive and all those sort of words. He got out of the car, looking carefully around just in case (he was paranoid that night, go figure), and then advanced towards the swings. There was someone there, resting his (or her?) back on a tree, hair falling in his (her) eyes.

"Excuse me…" as he got closer he felt a sting in the place his heat should have been. "Chalky?! What the Hell!!" ok, so maybe the shock he felt was a little worse than the words just described it, but he had a good reason for it too. His friend was wearing a skirt (bless who gave him the legs, **and** the one that invented shaving), that ran down to his knees, a pair of high-heels (that actually looked good on him), a white shirt that was large enough to make the loss of breasts unnoticed (he could always say that she was flat, simply put). Added to that, Chalky even went through the trouble of acquiring a bracelet and a necklace (white gold of course, probably stole them from an old lady, Crowley was proud of teaching him that).

"Told you I make a good lady, now close your mouth" Pollution replied and raised his hand to shut the demon's mouth.

"Too good" it was a strangled phrase, probably because some of Crowley's clothes became suddenly tight. "Yes…and your name is? **Miss**?"

"I was thinking of Verun, sounds nice, don't you agree?" Chalky gave him a wink.

"Of course Verunreinigung, why am I not surprised?"

"Verun White, so that I won't lose too much of my personality while I pretend I like you" Chalky started walking to the car, moving his hips so lady-like. "Going my dear? We don't want to be late now do we?"

To his surprise Crowley found himself nodding and following her…him, he meant him. Opening the left door to the car, he invited his 'date-for-the-night-hoping-for-more' to step inside as he took his rightful seat at the wheel. "Ok, so you look like a lady, you walk like a lady, but you have to talk like a lady too" Crowley pointed out as the Bentley started driving itself to the house (the demon had better things to do, like stare).

"Don't worry about that, you just worry on stopping eye-ogging me" between those two lines of perfect teeth, a tongue found its way out, pointing itself at our demon. "I can handle being a lady, Lust was more than a perfect teacher".

"Not eye-ogging anyone, I was just looking to see if you look good enough for me" Crowley snorted, "…besides, you're supposed to have blonde hair and blue eyes"

"Ever heard of the miraculous human invention called hair dye? And they have those things too, you can put the in your eyes and they change colors. They're called lens." Verun looked at the demon and gave him a wink. "Darling, we are going to be late" was there a woman or a man near him? He could swear that Pollution got **too well** into the role. Crowley snapped his fingers (a.k.a started driving) while mumbling something to himself and planting the glasses well on top of his nose. "How come you didn't ask that friend of yours? The angel…"

"What friend?" he reacted fast. "Gods, does the whole Hell know I know an angel?!"

"No, just me, I've been keeping an eye on you lately"

The car made an uneasy turn and slowed down considerately. "What? Who told you to do this? Cuz if it was Hastur I swear I'll…"

"No one put me chill will ya? Blow off some steam through your ears or something…Hastur did that the last time you talked to him, he seemed ok after"

"I'm not Hastur, and as your boyfriend I demand you to shut up about him" the demon looked out the window as the car picked up speed again.

"Lover, actually, at our supposed age we would be bedding." there was a sound and Crowley almost cracked his neck at the speed he turned his head to look at Chalky.

"The Hell?" he was…quite shocked, to say the least.

"I'm just saying that people…lovers, couples…"

"I **know** what you were pointing out, but it was just…blunt that's all." the human demon resumed his so-called driving.

"It was payback, you deserved it" Chalky flashed his eyelashes at him and then started arranging his hair.

"You don't have to ct like a girl now…" it was more of a murmur than a statement.

"I just want to look good, excuse me for helping you!"

"Ok, I get it! Jes…for fuck's sake, why does every Bible entity has to sound gay?" he started drumming his fingers on the wheel impatiently.

"Spare me, look who's talking. You have the heat for that angel, that's why you're not telling him that Adam is alive" Pollution gave him a subtle look and a grin.

"I do not"

"Predictable, the first step in admitting you like someone, is denying it" Chalky chuckled (could he look any more like a girl than he already did?!).

"And the second?"

"Not talking about it, which you're doing now, so you ,like him, case closed" fortunately the car stopped in front of the house in that moment, so the discussion ended.

"I don't!" he just had to have the last word, his ego was far to big to allow 'Verun' think he/she was right about all this. He stepped out of the car and walked to the other door, opening it for his 'date' to get out too.

"Why thank you my dear" Pollution gave him a grateful look (it must be hard walking in those high-heels), "and yes you do" with those last words he started walking towards the house, in a very luscious way (he had to remember to curse Lust). When Crowley's feet were brought back to life by the power of will (that also killed a certain part of his body, well not killed….just made it behave under the circumstances) he accompanied Verun to the door and slowly knocked (his plan, actually, was to stand in front of the door the whole time and then say that they rang, but nobody heard them). To his horror, they were heard. The door opened slowly and a very cheerfull Madam Young stood before them.

"So glad you could make it, dear dear, so glad" she smiled (fake, Crowly was an ace at that) and welcomed them in. He let 'Verun' enter first and then followed 'her'. Of course, he had to make the introductions.

"Verun, my dear. This is Madam Young, Adam's loving and caring mother" he poinded towards the woman (he will go to Heaven for this, he knew he will)...and then everything stopped for a minute, as he looked at Pollution. He was...was he?! Yes he was...and he couldn't see it because of the darkness. 'Verun' was wearing makeup, covering his/her slighty white features. He had his (of course, he won't be reffering to him as a her in his mind, now would he?) eyes framed in black and at a closer look, he even had a bit of grey on the eyelids. That, added the whole image of him dressed like that, made Crowley wanna start breathing only so that he could do it hard.

"Pleasure to meet you my dear" a hand was pushed in front of Pollution and he took it carefully. "Crowley here told us that you have blonde hair and blue eyes, what happened? Changed your lover before coming here?" Deirdre smiled over to him.

"I just dyed my hair" Verun said with a smile of his/her own. "You have to admit it fits me quite well, and I do hate the colour blue, so my dear bought me a pair of eye lens, to change my colour, grey is so much better, it's not as clean as blue".

"Oh…quite sure, weird tasted you have there sweetie. Oh this is my husband, Mister Young, and the one that's hiding behind the door is Adam." Deirdre waved a hand at the rest of the family members and then invited the two in. Verun, on the other hand took a rather unhealthy interest in Adam.

"I'm sure the two of us will get along very well" he said kneeling and petting Adam on the head.

"You look cute" was the only thing that the brat could say and then he ran up the stairs and in his room.

"My dear, wonder what happened to him?" mister Young said while he was inviting the guests in the living room.

"I'll take it on from here, darling please be a dear and fetch us something to drink, mine with ice, as you know." Deirdre said taking a seat at the already set table. "Oh please, take a sit" he gestured to the unoccupied chairs. Verun and Crowley sat next to each other, like a normal couple, they even held hands above the table. "You look so beautiful my dear" madam Young smiled at Pollution (actually it was a I'll-show-you-later kind of smile, they ignored it…and everyone was happy, more or less).

"Thank you very much, I appreciate the compliment" Verun smiled back (it was the same kind of smile…only Crowley noticed it…he had to get out of there).

"Oh it wasn't a compliment, I only said the truth. Compliments are only made when a person doesn't mean it" Deirdre dropped the smile.

"Oh, then I return it, you don't look bad yourself" at that point mister Young entered the room avoiding a natural disaster.

"Ready for some drinks?" he asked with a smile.

"Make it double for me" Deirdre said glaring at him (he didn't argue…he knew what was best for him). "So, how long have you been together?"

"For three years" Crowley jumped to answer, "we really love each other" he gave Verun a reassuring smile that was returned.

"My, my, so long…any plans?" at that question there was silence until Deirdre started to raise an eyebrow.

"Well…actually…we were thinking that…" Pollution started but was cut off by madam Young.

"I'm really sorry to be saying this, but…I don't see any chemistry between you two, now don't be mad, but I know this stuff." at that remark Crowley jumped as if a snake just bit his…between his legs (even a demon felt **that**).

"Of course there is! Darling…" he said turning to Pollution, "I…I wanted to do it on a special occasion but, seems that now it's the time" he kneeled down (while popping out a small box in his hand) and extended it. "Will you marry me?"

There was a gasp, a hit on the table and some other sounds. Pollution on the other hand, reacted all too naturally. He froze…simply froze. "I…"

"Say yes fuck it!" the human demon snarled.

"**No**!" madam Young jumped off her chair. "I…I mean it's too early…only three years, why don't you wait a bit?"

"**Yes**" Verun accentuated the word while looking at Deirdre. "I will" he took the ring and put it on his finger, grabbing Crowley up for a kiss (deep, passionate kiss).

"Here you go dear" mister Young entered the room.

"Bring another round, we have to celebrate. These two love birds just got engaged." Deirdre smiled (oh boy, and what smile that was, Crowley even shuddered). "Congratulations dears, to think that in **my** house…the nanny proposed…who would have guessed?"

"Yeah…who would have?" Crowley gave a 'I-signed-my-death-wish' smile.

"My that was so sudden" some forced laughs were placed in the room.

When the food was **finally** served, everyone was quiet (it wasn't polite to speak at the table…and it wasn't healthy either given the circumstances). The desert passed and still, no one was talking.

"Well, why don't we go in the living room and…play some cards?" mister Young proposed trying to lighten up the atmosphere.

"I'm sorry, but me and **my future husband**" Pollution looked at Deidre as he said that (and Crowley cursed his existence), "have to get home, this **is** a special night for us"

"Of course it is" the man smiled and then immediately left the room as he saw Deirdre's expression.

"Probably the food and his stomach are having a fight" madam Young said. "Let me walk you to the door dears" she got up and gestured for them to do the same.

"Thank you very much" Crowley replied wondering if telling Satan that Adam was dead was safer than the situation he got himself in. He only relaxed when he felt the car wheel in his hands. "I'm fucked…and not in the good way".

"Oh come on, it wasn't that bad" Pollution replied fixing his hair.

"Would you stop that? You don't have to pretend anymore!"

"But I want to look good for my husband" he said with a brilliant smile.

"Oh shut up, I had to do that" Crowley growled (no really, he actually growled).

"You **do** realize that they'll expect to be invited to the actual wedding" Pollution pointed out.

"There will be no wedding! Imagine having you around for all eternity…'till death do us part' my horns…I bet that the one who made that up didn't think of us immortals!"

"I make a good wife too"

"How do you know that? Wife stands in: washing, ironing, fucking, etc. are you good at any of those?" Crowley lowered his sunglasses so that Pollution could see his raised eyebrow.

"Washing and ironing can be learned…fucking on the other hand…you can find out" he fluttered his eyelashes in a **very** seducing way.

"I'll pass thank you" he arrived at the park (faster than he planned). "Where are you staying?"

"In the air, in the water…all around? Why?" Pollution answered getting out of the car.

"Smart-ass…never mind. How can I get to you if I need you again?"

"You can get me anytime…but I'll know…I'll come if you need me" saying that he closed the door and walked away.

"I dunno if I should thank you or curse you" Crowley mumbled and snapped his fingers driving away.


	4. Chapter 4

"What the fuck have I gotten myself into

"What the fuck have I gotten myself into?" Crowley started drumming his fingers on the wheel of his precious Bentley. "Marriage?! No way! Pollution can blow my horns if he thinks that **I**'m getting married!" it was all because of Adam **and** his mom (deliberately he excluded the part where **he** made Pollution become Verun). The human demon began wondering if he should just do her and get this over with, but then the image of Deidre naked came in his mind and almost made him puke what he ate two months ago at the Ritz. "No fucking way!" and two cars crashed behind him to emphasize the conclusion. The engine stopped in front of the small shop that Aziraphale owned as Crowley practiced his breathing lessons. "Ok, it passed…I'm ok" he tried convincing his uncooperative mind. "The fuck I am" the car door closed by itself behind him. "Zira!" he yelled.

"Could you be anymore louder my dear? I think that Heaven and Hell haven't heard you" the angel got off the armchair that Crowley 'gave' him on the last visit.

"Didn't see you there" the human demon approached him and surprisingly, hugged him. "Missed me?"

"No"

"Thought so" oh boy, that grin didn't announce anything good, Aziraphale was sure of that. "So..." Crowley made himself comfortable on the armchair and looked around, "…what do you wanna do?"

"Well, I wasn't expecting such a sudden visit, so I really don't know…" his words were cut short by a pair of lips over his.

"I can think of something" Crowley snapped his fingers and the sign on the door now said '**Closed**'.

"I can see…oh dear I don't think…"

"Good, thinking's bad for ya" with another snap of his fingers the demon unzipped both his and the angel's pants.

"Oh Go…I mean never mind." The glare that Crowley gave him was enough for the angel to get the message. His lips got busy with Aziraphale's chest, sucking, licking and biting until they reached their target. Tongue came into motion, demanding (and gaining) entrance in the angel's mouth.

"Do I sense a plead there?" oh that grin, it was both annoying and enchanting at the same time.

"I'd never" the angel's hands traveled up and removed the black sunglasses revealing those yellow cat-like eyes. He ran one of his hands on Crowley's cheek and brushed away the strain locks that lingered there.

"You know you just told a lie back there" the human demon started licking the side of Aziraphale's neck.

"No I didn't…angels do not lie" how many times did he say that before? "I didn't miss you…just your presence" surprisingly, it was hard enough to talk when a certain demon is using his tongue on certain places of the body.

"Works for me" Crowley pushed Aziraphale back on the one person bed ( fingers snapping can work miracles, thus transforming a desk in a one person bed when needed and also drawing the curtains to the windows) and climbed on top of him. One hand traveled down, removing the boxers (again? Really, this was getting ridiculous, when would Zira start wearing medieval underwear so he could be right, for once). "My, my…"

"Don't dare say anything" the angel warned him. It seemed that the demon had no intentions of giving a witty comment. He leaned over Aziraphale's stomach and placed kisses lower and lower. "Oh Go…" he was interrupted by a growl.

"Really, you want me to plaster your mouth? Cuz I can do that, no problem"

"I'll be quiet" wait…**why** did he say that?

"No, I don't want you to be quiet, just stop talking." With that said, Crowley regain his motion between Aziraphale's legs. True to his words, the angel didn't say anything, he only let out a moan (that was more coherent than any of the things that came in his mind). He arched his back as the human demon ran his tongue on the top of his shaft, earning a grin (he felt it, rather than saw it actually, kinda the same thing). When the lips surrounded his hard member, Aziraphale began to shiver (since panting was a problem). Angel or no angel, he nearly growled when then demon stopped.

"Oh, patience, this ain't over" should he trust that grin, or fear it? He'll decide later, right now, he was kind of busy. A pair of hands lifted his feet on Crowley's shoulders. "It won't hurt, trust me" **of course** the angel rose an eyebrow as high as he could (who wouldn't when a demon says to **trust** him?!). Two fingers entered his mouth, urging Aziraphale to lick them. "Ok… I guess you're new at this, obviously" the demon rolled his eyes as the angel glared, "…well, you should just relax." those fingers traveled down his body in a place that (of course) never experimented what it was about to. "You know why I don't like talking in a moment like this?" the angel shook his head as one of the fingers entered him. "Because everything sounds so corny" Crowley grinned when he saw Aziraphale squirming underneath him. He added another finger and started moving them in a scissoring motion. He knew that the angel got used to the feeling when he started pushing back against him (Hell of a subtle way to figure it out). This time Aziraphale felt something **else** entering him (and for sure it wasn't a finger except if Crowley suddenly decided to return to his natural form). A hand settled on each side of his head as the demon kissed him. He pulled out almost completely and then re-entered him. He knew how to move to make Aziraphale moan and close his eyes in delight (or at least he hoped it was delight). The legs slipped from the demon's shoulder and entangled around his waist as the angel stared pushing back against him. Before he knew what was happening, Aziraphale found his hands pinned above his head as Crowley was kissing him. The image was quite erotic (so what? Angels can use that word too…he guessed) as Aziraphale opened his eyes and saw Crowley above him, with his lips slightly opened and his eyes closed. The grip on his shoulders increased as the movement picked up a pace. It wasn't long after that the demon gave a loud demon-like growl, ceasing the movement. If the angel thought it was over, he was wrong. The tongue that cleaned him up didn't allow him to close his eyes, it kept them open in surprise.

"See? It didn't hurt" Crowley said, slowly pulling out. "You should trust me more often".

"Don't go thinking so high and mighty of yourself" Aziraphale said (as soon as he made sure that he **could ** talk). "Where did you get the lube from?"

"Zira, who needs lube when I have snapping fingers?" Crowley crossed his hands behind his head and looked at the angels figure. "Cute"

"Yes…well…" Aziraphale headed for the bathroom, "…don't do anything until I clean up"

"Why don't you just snap it? Takes less" the human demon gave a demonstration by popping out a cigarette.

"Because" the cigar disappeared as Crowley growled, "I like it the old fashion way; and no smoking"

"What is this? Hell?" his complain remained unheard as the door closed and the water started running. "The Heck" he couldn't suppress his smile. Snapping his fingers, the clothes came back on him and the desk returned to its natural shape. Opening the door and pulling up the curtains, he watched the smoke disappear in the air (his thoughts drifted to Pollution, but he would never admit it).

"Lost in thought?" the voice brought him back on Earth as Aziraphale, completely dressed, came by his side.

"Yes, ah and we dine at the Ritz, that was the reason of my visit…but I got distracted" Crowley grinned.

"I am sure you did."

"Oh come on, next time it'll hurt less"

"Next time?!" Aziraphale thought he might have heard wrong.

"Yeah, you just need practice."

"And I'm sure you're willing to sacrifice your precious time to help me" the angel said matter-of-factly.

"Of course, now come on, I'll drive normally" the gentle-demon opened the car door for Aziraphale.

"That's a first"

"Let's just say that I'm in a good mood…again, that Tweed jacket"

"I like it" it was the only answer that Crowley got as he started the car. "Mozart? Bach?"

"Try Queen" the demon turned on the radio (normally). As they entered the intersection, Freddy Mercury's voice was replaced by a growl.

"_How's the child demon?_" Hastur nearly roared.

Crowley almost hit the car in front of him as he hurried to turn off the radio (forgetting about the snapping fingers).

"What child?" Aziraphale asked confused.

"I don't know, probably got the frequency wrong, there are a lot of interferences between Hell and Earth you know…" the nervous laugh was painfully obvious.

"What child was he talking about?" the angel insisted.

"Probably a future criminal that will end up in Hell and confront Satan, I don't know Zira. What do you want to eat tonight?"

"You can't lie well when you're stressed"

"I'm not stressed" he **accidentally **increased the speed crossing on a red light. "I'd go for the chicken, I heard it's delicious."

"You hate chicken" Aziraphale said plainly.

"I do? I changed my tastes." He was quiet after that and resumed his driving.

"So…what was that about the child?"

"Drop it, I don't know…

"You don't want to say, it's a difference." The angel looked out the window at the passing trees.

"Listen, if I tell you that the Antichrist was alive and that I took care of him would you believe me?" Crowley started drumming his fingers on the wheel.

"No, you killed him at birth, I saw it." Aziraphale looked at him with wide eyes.

"Then I don't know what child was Hastur talking about." (note to self in his mind: when you have the chance and the place, make it up for this minute). So they decided to drop the mater (Crowley did, Aziraphale just put it on hold). They arrived in front of the restaurant and the gentle-human-demon escorted his angel at the front door. "Anthony J. Crowley" he said to the lady that was checking the reservations.

"Glad you could make it this time sir" she smiled and took them to their table saying that someone was to come and pick up their orders in a moment.

"Enchanting young lady"

"As long as you give her a large tip" Crowley said under his breath.

"I'm sure that your kind had something to do with it" Aziraphale replied looking into the menu.

"And your kind invented tips so we're even. I'll have the beef" he said as the waiter came at their table.

"And I'll have the lobster. What about that chicken?"

"I…changed my taste again" Crowley drank form the wine that the waiter poured them. "Merlot, the best" he rose his glass making Aziraphale do the same. They toasted, each for different things, but all in all the same.

"So what have you been up to? Besides telling lies"

"Well, I made a friend dress as a girl so he could save me from a lady…and now I'm supposed to get married to him/her…and I corrupted an angel" Crowley smirked.

Aziraphale gave a small laugh as he took another delicate (gay-like from Crowley's point of view) sip of the wine. "You cannot corrupt the willing"

The human demon nearly dropped the glass on his expensive Armani pants and stared at the angel behind the sunglasses. "I'd say it's a miracle and praise God but then I'd probably go to Heaven and Satan will cut off my salary…but…dear Manchester Aziraphale!" he just couldn't suppress his grin, he just couldn't.

"My aren't you enjoying yourself." A voice made Crowley wish to gasp. "Mind if I take a seat? No oil stains I promise" Pollution smiled at the human-demon.

Aziraphale looked from the newcomer to Crowley and back before he spoke. "Aren't you going to introduce us?"

"A…friend" Crowley muttered.

"Figured as much."

"Zira, this is Verun, Verun this is Zira" his voice betrayed his 'enthusiasm'.

"Aziraphale" the angel rose a hand above the table.

"Pollution, nice to meet you, finally" he extended his hand and shook the one offered to him. That made Crowley squirm in his seat.

"What do you want?"

"I was in the neighborhood and decided to drop in on you, I sensed your presence." Pollution smiled at Crowley's growl.

"Say, where are your other three friends? Aren't you supposed to be together?" Aziraphale asked.

"Oh, we only gather when the Antichrist is born, so there's no need for it now. War is on a rampage in Iraq, but I think she'll move to Georgia pretty soon, Hunger is rounding up some fashion models, you know the kind obsessed with their weight, and Death was talking about taking a vacation in Jamaica"

"So what are you up to?" the angel rose an eyebrow.

"Me? Nothing much really, just floating around decaying nature, leaving stains for people to slip on…the usual" Pollution smiled.

"Don't you have anything else to do?" Crowley asked drumming his fingers on the table (it was a habit when he was nervous or stressed).

"As a matter of fact I do, I came here with orders. Satan wants me to show you something" Pollution motioned for him to get up and follow. "A pleasure meeting you angel, maybe we'll get together sometime, I'd like that"

"I wish I could say the same" Aziraphale returned the almost natural smile.

"I'll be right back" Crowley and Pollution stepped out of the restaurant. "What's the order?"

"I thought you figured it out that it was a lie, man you are in love with that angel aren't you?" Pollution rolled his eyes in exasperation.

"So why the heck did you drag me out here for?"

"Excuse me, it wasn't dragging, you came willingly…and besides, you didn't answer the question so it means a 'yes'." 'Verun' took a few steps back. "You fucked him didn't you?"

"What's it to you?" Crowley leaned on the wall and lit a cigarette.

"It'll kill you….it makes more Pollution, thanks. And it's nothing to me, but…you have that I-fucked-an-angel look on your face, also the I-didn't-tell-him-about-Adam-and-I-just-lied-about-it-earlier look is there too."

"What? The Pollution-is-starting-to-get-annoying look is in disguise? Look, thanks for helping me, but stop following my every step".

"I'm not following you, I just wanted to see for myself, besides you still owe me, I haven't said which body I want."

"See what? And tell me so I can get it over with already." Crowley said impatiently.

"You're obviously head over horns with that angel, but…does he feel the same for you?" ok, Crowley had to give it to him, he knew how to get a demon curious (he didn't show it though).

"And?" he couldn't help himself.

"Interested aren't we? But don't forget one thing." Pollution rose one of his hands and touched Crowley's cheek as he smiled. "A fiancée has the right to protect the future husband" by the time the words entered Crowley's mind and were processed, all that was left in front of him was an oil stain.

"No fucking way" he muttered and headed towards the front desk.

"What are you talking about? No one entered the restaurant after you came" the girl looked confused. Crowley cursed and sat back down at his table.

"Charming man" Aziraphale said.

"You don't have to lie you know" the demon took a sip out of his wine (drank the whole glass) and started eating.

"I wasn't telling a lie." The angel took a bite out of his lobster.

"That's why you don't like him" the only answer that Crowley got was a smile and a sip of wine.

"I was thinking…." Aziraphale started.

"Kills the brain"

"…what would happen if the Antichrist would be alive" (Crowley nearly chocked…or well, close to it). "No more books to read and no more wine, no more Ritz…"

"No more mobile phones and TV" he suddenly realized that it was a bad thing.

"No more us…"

"Rewind"

"If the world comes to an end, I'll go to Heaven I hope, and you to Hell, we can't see each other anymore" Aziraphale explained as he carefully settled the fork and knife on the side of the plate.

"But…" behind the sunglasses his eyes were wide open, mostly out of shock (really, he could have realized it earlier).

"But not to worry, it won't happen since the Antichrist is dead" Aziraphale gave him a reassuring smile.

"Yeah true" though the stone in his stomach said the contrary. He gave a nervous laugh and escorted the angel to his car as soon as they paid (well he paid and Aziraphale made sure to leave the waiter a big tip, to Crowley's despair). The car started at the snap of the demon's fingers. "What I drank." He told Zira when he received a curious look (radio was turned off of course, Crowley was in no mood for music, or so he said).

"So I guess I'll see you in a few months or maybe you'll just pop up again as you did today, it was a pleasure" Aziraphale leaned over the opened window of the car.

Crowley raised his head to reach the angels lips, keeping the kiss at a 'normal' level. "I'll come, don't worry."

"My dear, you should arrive first, and then 'come'." Aziraphale entered the shop leaving a very shocked demon behind him.

"Oy love-birds…kissing over the window, how sweet."

"Get **out** of this car this second!!" Crowley yelled as he saw Pollution in the mirror.

"So rude"

"If I see **one** oil stain on that bench I'll kill you!"

"Good luck" there was a note of amusement in his tone.

"I'll make this world Pollution-free, don't get me started!"

"And do a good deed, Zira would be pleased"

"Don't call him like that!"

"Anyway…what's this thought about killing Adam?" Pollution popped his head between the front seats.

"How did you know?" the demon's figure betrayed shock.

"Oh trust me, the whole Hell knows, so next time you have a brainstorm, try keeping it to yourself" there was a grin, Crowley was sure of that.

"And you try butting out of my business"

"Oh don't be like that. Admit it, you want me to tell you what I think about angel-boy over there, and you want it bad. Well, let me give you a small clue" there was a knot in Crowley's stomach for a second as Pollution spoke. "If you haven't figured out the answer, it means that you know it already" a pair of lips touched his cheek and Pollution was gone (with no oil stain as he promised). Now he seriously needed to sigh (he knew he should have mastered the breathing technique, though it was still a miracle how he could smoke without breathing, must be the constant need of smoke in his body, Hell was to blame for that). The car pulled in front of the cozy looking house. A kid was playing in the mud.

"Cowley!!" Adam rose to his feet and clung to the demon's pants.

"C**r**owley you brat! You want me to tattoo it on my forehead for ya??" his complain remained unanswered. "Sure, that's what I needed, to end a day…mud on my Armani!" he stomped towards the house and rang the doorbell (as the brat still clung to his leg). Deidre opened the door and gave him a vide smile (**of course** it **was** Crowley), inviting him in.

"Adam go and change dear, you'll ruin the carpet" she said in a motherly voice. "_And my pants_" the human demon thought as he entered.

"Stay tonight pwease!!" Adam started whining.

"I don't think that I can…I have some work to do" he stopped as soon as tears started gathering in his eyes, "…ok don't cry I'll stay" damn it, he stood too long with that angel. The brat smiled and ran to his room. He was doomed.

"Oh so glad you can stay" Deidre smiled from ear to hear (was he the only one that found that creepy?). "I'll set up another plate at the table"

"Oh, no need, I already ate…and I need to go check if the car is locked…safety you know" Crowley excused himself from the house and nearly ran in the street. "_Hastur's gonna have my horns" _ he opened the front door and turned on the radio almost immediately. He waited a few seconds and then it started. Hastur's voice began to roar in the radio.

"_What in the name of Hell were you doing you low life demon?!_"

"Chill your horns, I was with Adam and you scared him so I had to turn it off"

"_How is the child?_" there was distrust in that voice Crowley knew.

"He's ok, how can he be? Alive and well"

"_Don't dare think you can get away with anything! I'll be checking on you!_" after that the radio went dead; and so would have Crowley, only that he didn't have a heart to cease beating. The human demon dragged his feet towards the house (obviously he had no intention of hurrying).

"My dear, mister young just called and said that he'll be spending the night over at his mother's (why did Crowley doubt that high and mighty?) so you can sleep in his place." She added a smile after that.

"The couch will do just fine, thank you for the effort" was it him, or did she just…growl?).

"But it is no effort, ok I will get you one of my husbands pajamas, I'm sure it'll fit just fine"

"And I will check on Adam, he is taking his time" Crowley managed to get away again, she was about to ask him to follow her. Opening the door to Adam's room, he saw that the brat sat in one corner, looking straight at him, or at the door. Those blue eyes set on him, it was the very first time that Adam crept Crowley out (and he didn't get crept out so easily, he had Hastur to deal it for Manchester's sake). "Come on kid, you need to feed so that you can grow strong and destroy the world for daddy…make him proud" as he said that Adam launched himself at Crowley's leg (why even bother to get rid oh him, he was like a boomerang, throw him away, he'll always come back). The human demon stumbled in the kitchen and made the kid sit properly at the table.

"I swear…" Deidre said, "…he listens to you more than he does to us." of course he did, in a way, he was related with Crowley….the provenience place anyway.

"You have to eat to become strong and grow up to be a fine lad" wait a minute….where did that come from? He's been hanging around that angel for too long, for Zira's sake (of course he did **not** intend to say that but it just came out that way, he had nothing to do with it, it was his vocal cords to blame). Murderously slow, Adam finally finished eating and asked Crowley to read him a bedtime story, which the human-demon did. Of course he said a very nice tale about his neighbor from across the street that cheated on his wife with the maid and sold people cars with the gas-tank almost empty (all disguised as sweet fairies with golden wings and charming prince boys playing strip poker with the dragons on a cloud). When the brat was finally asleep, Crowley made his way to the living room.

"He is asleep?" a voice scared the horns off his head.

"Yeah…yeah Madam Young…he is. And I would like to do the same too." Crowley saw that she already brought his her husbands pajamas and was expecting him to change there.

"Oh for Christ's sake, as if I never saw a naked man before" she sat down on the sofa and pretended to be looking at the walls (actually she was looking at the wall behind Crowley). He turned his back on her and pulled on his night-clothes (he had no escape did he? His plan of running out the window was about to fail) and then wanted to lay on the sofa.

"I want to get some sleep, I'm tired as Hell"

"Oh not to worry sweetie, I can help you relax" her hand **accidentally **landed on the human-demon's tights and was moving up.

"I'm too tired…it…" Crowley tried to escape but this time, fate was against him (wasn't it always?). Deidre pulled him on near her and proceeded in taking over him. "Seriously…I can't" he tried and he tried to get away, but both his hands were busy. With one he pushed her away and with the other he wanted to get her hand out of his…Mister Young's pants.

"Let me try dear"

"No use"

"I can make it"

"You can't I know my body, it's dead!!"

"Oh seriously now"

"I tell you, it won't get up, it's too tired now please!" he was reaching despair limit, as her hand almost reached its target….and then…everything stopped (and started reeking). The front door opened and something huge and smelling came in the house almost bringing down the ceiling with his horns.

"HASTUR!!" Crowley yelled at the top of his stolen lungs. "Good…Manchester I never in the whole eternity thought I'd say this but….**thank you**!" he managed to escape the frozen woman that was about to demon-rape him and hurried to the Duke's side. "Oh and this is not what it looks like" he added in the process.

"_Filthy human…and you low life…how could you_?" Hastur started roaring.

"Hey hey, not what it looks like remember? Besides…what's wrong with a demon having some fun once in a while? I can even go against the one up there and fuck a man….or an angel" Crowley smirked. Hastur only looked at him with a puzzled expression (his nine millimeters brain only allowed him to process information lower than 12 points of IQ) and then started stomping around the house.

"_Where is the child?_"

"He's..sleeping, you know he needs his rest" but then a door opened and Adam came out looking for the source of all this noise. "Wait….he's not…frozen?"

"_Of course he isn't…he's part of Hell._" Ok so Crowley got owned there.

"Adam, go back to sleep, there's nothing for you to see here" (of course every young boy would pass on the opportunity of seeing a real demon from Hell just so that he can go to sleep). Adam stepped forward and clung to Crowley's leg.

"Friend?"

"You can say that" the human-demon answered and picked him up in his arms. "See Hastur? He as all four limbs, two ears…two eyes, though with time…that might change."

"_Is he operational_?"

"What are we talking about here? My car? Yeah it works just fine…"

"_The child!_" the Duke of Hell roared again and the windows started shaking. "_Any frightening deeds?_"

"He's only three and something, the only horrible deed he can do is drive me mad and puke on my clothes for Manchester's sake" Crowley said surprised Hastur even thought about that.

"_Satan wants to see him_"

"What?? Take him a picture, Adam can't go, imagine the nightmares and his trauma….he is a kid after all." The human demon pressed on the matter not noticing that Adam fell asleep in his arms. "So…that's why you came?"

"_That and to check on you. Satan demanded to see him_" he was in trouble.

"Listen here…take him a few years later, when his powers evolve and he ca show 'daddy' just what he can do… not now." Hastur seemed to be pondering on the fact for a few minutes.

"_Don't think you can get away with anything_" the Duke turned to leave the house.

"Always the trusting type" Crowley said matter-of-factly as he went to Adam's room and put him back in bed. He kneeled near him and just stared. "Jeez kid, you do realize how much trouble you're bringing me?…but in your own annoying and utterly sickening way…you're adorable, not to mention you saved me way back there…" Adam turned and clung to Crowley's hand (even in his sleep he did that, though it wasn't as annoying as it was awake).


	5. Chapter 5

~*~

"What are you talking about?" he tried to keep his cool voice and attitude, but his underwear was shaking, probably out of fear (he'd never ever admit that).

"You and Verun or how his **friends** call him, Pollution, seemed pretty close" Aziraphale looked at the children passing by him and smiled at them. He was an angel after all, even if he was bedded by a demon.

"Well, we used to hang out in Hell, but now we're too busy to do anything" the human demon tried his best to keep his voice from trembling. Fuck fuck fuck and add a couple of more fucks on the way!

"Parties in Hell? Without smoking?"

"Ah we used to sneak out and do that. If Satan saw us…" he let out a small laugh remembering the old times. "But that passed!" he added as soon as he noticed Aziraphale's gaze on him. "We only talk from time to time, that's all"

"How funny of you to try to explain yourself in front of me" Zira chuckled and leaned his head on Crow's shoulder. "But you know…" there was an evil note in that tone…oh Manchester…what has he brought upon him, Crowley thought desperately. "…I'm not quite ready to give you up" he raised his head and pressed his lips on his, in a meaningful way.

"You know…I usually wouldn't mind, but…there are people around here…and I'd rather go back to your shop" Crowley whispered in his ear as he looked around. Alright he was paranoid, but he didn't want Ver…**Pollution **watching him right now.

"My shop is miles away. You brought me in London to witness the beauty. I found one and I want to study it up close" wow…that was damn straight forward for an angel.

"Zira…you spend too much time with me" the human demon smiled and leaded him to the car. Radio turned off (of course he wouldn't let that over-grown worm infested Duke ruin his plan of…having a good time) the car drove all the way to Crowley's apartment. Aziraphale spent a few minutes eye-ogging the walls and the sofa and the carpet and the windows and the plants…ok everything.

"Who would have guessed" he said as he advanced in the room. "White leather sofa, it'd be a shame to mess it up" he looked at the human demon with a smirk.

"That's why I have a bed too" Crowley took him by his hand and almost managed to drag the angel with him.

"How come your plants are so well kept?"

"Because they know what's good for them…look are you going to admire the plants or come with me?" he started drumming his fingers on Zira's arm.

"Yes sorry…it's just that you really must care for them, look how healthy they are" the angel finally gave in and followed Crowley to his bedroom.

"Oh I do care…you don't even know how much" fortunately Zira didn't catch the grin on his face or the shivering of the poor plants in their pots. Patience wasn't something implanted in his demon form, so it never occurred in the human one either. By definition, demons weren't patient. Demons in human forms…well, you can pick up the thread of thoughts from here, so it was no wonder that in less than five minutes the angel lay naked on the bed. Ok, so it **still** came as a surprise to find boxers, but he'll just have to deal with it until his mind registered that he'll never be right in what concerns Zira's underwear. He was shocked though to find himself pinned on the bed and the angel on top of him. Opening his mouth, he didn't manage to let any words out as Aziraphale pressed his lips over his, tongue tangling with the other one in a fluid motion. Hands traveled down the body and unfastened the belt as he slid the demon's expensive pants down. "What…" he moved his head to the left so that he could get the lingering words out.

"You said that you can do wicked things with that tongue of yours…I learned my lesson, but did you?" Zira smiled and leaned forward for another kiss as the demon's shirt disappeared.

"You'll Fall…" the smirk was ever so vivid on Crowley's face as he leaned back on the bed and let the angel have his fun.

"And you'll catch me won't you?" he grabbed a nipple between his lips and started nibbling gently on it and then moved to the other as he extracted soft moans from the per…creat…**demon **beneath him. He moved down as Crowley arched his back and dug his fingers in the sheets. "Impatient aren't we?"

"Demons aren't supposed to be patient…or tender" he said as he suppressed a moan. Damn that angel and his hands. He felt one on his length, ascending and descending in a slow rhythm and a slight breath at the top. "Go…**Manchester** angel get it on already!" he nearly cursed. He got an answer and oh Manchester, what an answer. Letting out a half moan, quarter curse – quarter plead, he bucked his hips but a hand held him down. He couldn't help it, he wanted more, demons were greedy by nature, added if a hot angel was sucking you off…yeah he couldn't help his reactions. Slowly, agonizingly slow, Aziraphale moved his head in a bobbing motion that almost sent Crowley off the cliff. Almost, because a hand grabbed the base of his shaft and prevented him from reaching his climax. "Oh no!" he groaned. "Damn angel…" his words were interrupted by another moan as Aziraphale stared moving his head again and hummed. His hand never left the place it was and it was driving the demon mad. He never expected that the angel would be this good. A series of curses infiltrated his mind as the angel let his tongue travel on his length, from tip to base, of course lingering on the slit just to add a bit more to his torment. "Damn…" that was it, if Zira wouldn't stop soon he'd let his lust take over. As he thought that the movements ceased. Desperately he opened his eyes and looked at the angel on top of him. A smirk, that was all he could see. An evil, filled with lust smirk. Two fingers traveled on his body, upwards this time, entering his mouth.

"As you once said…it's not over yet" Aziraphale said and urged him to lick his fingers. He let his tongue pass over them, wetting them with his saliva before they were pulled out. The smirk never left those lips, as Zira spread open his legs and let his fingers wonder in that area. Crowley wanted to swallow hardly, to inhale, to moan and to smoke in the same time but he settled with watching the angel do his stuff. He pushed a finger inside him as Crow opened his eyes as wide as he could careful not to miss anything. It was one thing when he prepared the angel but another seeing him prepare himself, so he watched in awe. The second finger was added, started a scissoring motion as Aziraphale gave a moan himself. He was flushed and looked like he would burst anytime soon, but he couldn't let that happen now could he? The demon's hand moved to the angel's waist and pulled him close as his lips crashed over the other pair. The other hand was busy with the hardness he found along his exploring, bringing it in contact with his own. They both hissed at the touch (Crowley giving a more natural hiss due to his nature).

"Listen…now or I can't guarantee for my actions" the human demon was having trouble speaking. He was pushed back though, by a firm hand. Lust that damn sin…he really really needed to talk with her, set some things straight. His eyes settled upon the angel as he rose his hips and lowered himself on the demon. "Go…" his words were halted by a hand over his mouth.

"What's with you and the divinity all of a sudden?" Aziraphale grinned and pushed down all the way.

"**Fuck!**" now **that **was a regular word for this demon to use. He arched his back at the touch, in a way no human could (without having a horrible pain the next day anyway) encircling the angel with his hands. His hips started moving, up and down, allowing Crowley to see everything with every motion. Aziraphale still wouldn't let him move, doing all the work by himself, and he had to admit, it was damn enchanting. "Could you…faster…" those were the only words that he managed to let out from the series that still roamed his mind. He was sure he heard a grin.

"Still impatient" the angel looked at him and then slid down once again, this time hearing his plead. He groaned and tried to free his hand once again. He succeeded (didn't have time to wonder whenever Zira let him go or he used his force, it didn't matter actually). Grabbing the slender waist he pinned the angel to the bed underneath him, settling for a rhythm that he preferred (and that meant faster). Pulling almost out, he then rammed back letting his head fall back and opening his mouth in a silent moan. His eyes moved from the ceiling to the blue ones that were set on him and he regretted it immediately. They were full of mischief and satisfaction (maybe he was wrong there…what was the angel intending anyway? Oh well scratch that, he was having a too good time to ruin it with thinking. The eternity was for that). One of his hands was set on Zira's shaft and guided in an ascending and descending movement. Crowley lowered himself until their chests touched, catching the angel's length between them. The friction caused by the movement made him moan and clench at the demon's arms. Head buried in the pillow he rose his hips trying to help Crowley get deeper inside. The sudden "Oh Go…" muffled by the human's demon arm told him he reached a certain spot.

"I know he's your boss, but don't bring him in our sex please" Crowley hissed and started moving faster, every time hitting that spot that made the angel squirm and let out incoherent sounds. His hands resumed their motion on the shaft as he made Aziraphale raise his legs around him. This way he had better access. Lingering around at the top, just as he was tortured he pressed along the side, sliding his thumb over the slit, all this time watching the angel. It was a bit too much to bare, the sounds, the touching…the everything. Making a rather sudden move from up to down and then from down to up, he made Aziraphale open his eyes and almost shout as he came all over his hand. The spasm made his clench around Crowley, sending him over the edge a few seconds later. This time, he could easily say that even a demon tired. He fell over the angel, giving him a soft kiss on the skin he could touch, and lay there for a couple of minutes.

"Well that was…interesting" finally, he spoke; there was one thing he wanted to know.

"What was?" Aziraphale looked at the ceiling (more like contemplated what came over him).

"You were so…ambitious…well, that's actually a soft way of putting it" Crowley was having a hard time finding his words (yeah well, it's usually hard to explain something you yourself don't understand…even for demons).

"You have your secrets and I have mine, I find it fair enough…" ouch, that was blunt.

"I don't…" no wait….he does. "Yeah, fair enough I think…but still…" maybe he could take a detour to what he wanted to know, or rather, to see if he was actually right.

"No 'still's or 'but's." Zira ended the discussion (ok no detour to the target for Crowley).

"Ok…then have it your way" the human demon snapped his fingers and popped a cigarette in his hand. The angel looked a bit suspicious at him but said nothing. "Whaaat?" ok he had to ask, he was curious, demons were curious by nature.

" Nothing, did I say anything?"

"No but it was in your eyes!" Crowley made his way to the edge of the bed and looked at him.

"Fine then…" the statement was followed by the angel's hand covering his eyes. "Happy now?"

"Let's drop it" he was in no mood for a fight…not now, not with him. Damn, he was totally on the hook.

"Good idea" the angel rolled him over and moved to the edge of the bed, "I'll head for a shower" his legs dangled a bit before touching the ground, but before he could get up he was pulled back by a firm grip.

"I liked it" Crowley only said before locking their lips in a soft kiss, different from the ones before. It was slow and…almost as if the demon wanted to prove something to him (he decided to put the thought on hold as a hand stroked his hair tenderly). Aziraphale could only smile.

The human demon popped out a cigarette and an ashtray (it **was** his lovely white bed after all, he couldn't risk getting it burned…of course he could always pop one out but it wasn't the same - now this bed held memories in it) and settled comfortable on the pillows wile raising an eyebrow to the staring angel.

"Nothing" Zira shook his head and headed for the bathroom. His bare feet hit the cold floor as he made his way to the bathtub big enough for ten people plus Crowley in his demon form. "_Figures_" he grinned as he let the hot water fill half the tub before sliding in. It did wonders to his muscles (especially the 'just used' ones) and he let the water wash away everything, except the touches. They lingered on his skin, as if burned in it, making him moan softly. "Ah damn" he sunk in the water to stop himself. The words came out more as a drowning sound as the water came in his mouth, but they echoed around the walls and came back at him. Well…one thing was for sure…he was **hooked.**


End file.
